(Predominantly Female) (Predominately Male)
1) Sense of Self
1) Sense of Self
strongly nonindividualistic on the surface, strongly individualistic
gives up individuality for the sake of experiences his individuality to the exclusion
the relationship of relationship
sees world as centered on others sees the world as centered on himself
overly concerned and protective of others; overly concerned and self-protective;
always looking out for others always looks out for self
Chooses to be like others or yield for the sake chooses to be different for its own sake
of unity
Feels empty without interaction with others feels crowded in relationship with others
2)Trust 2) Trust
tends to be naïve about relationships; optimistic pessimistic about other’s motives; cynic
about other’s motives
overly trusting; frequently taken advantage of highly suspicious of others and relationships with
them
3) Emotions 3) Emotions
primarily people and feeling oriented primarily object and logic oriented
overemotional; seeks out emotions overemphasis on thinking and logic; fears emotionality emotions and emotionality; avoids them
wears emotions “on shoulder” affect can be elusive
overly sympathetic and empathetic little sympathy for, or empathy with, others
4) Emotional Boundaries
4) Emotional Boundaries
ill defined; loose, open, no secrets overly protected; closed, mysterious
may be nosey, intrusive needs a lot of “space”
5) Sense of
Responsibility
5) Sense of Responsibility
overly responsible under responsible
assumes too much responsibility for the feels little responsibility for his situation
relationship or relationship
6) Rhythm of Change
6) Rhythm of Change
overly impatient tends to be overly patient; procrastinator
cannot delay dealing with problems avoids facing relationship problems
lacks restraint; impulsive prone to relationship paralysis
7) Personal Problem-Solving Style
7) Personal Problem-Solving Style
emotional engagement; best and only solution avoidance; believes ignoring a problem will cause
is the most direct it to go away
seeks emotionally charged, reactive situations; seeks peace; avoids emotional crises
tends to provoke crises
8) View of Love 8) View of Love
overly romantic; overlooks practical aspects overemphasizes practical aspects; overlooks
of relationship; “Love conquers All” romantic aspects of relationship; "Love is fine,
but it doesn't pay the bills”
9) Sexuality
9) Sexuality
sex seen as a sign of caring for and by partner. Sex seen as a physical act, independent of caring.
Sexual distancer Sexual Pursuer